Thoughts On Parenting

King David was very old now, so old that he couldn't even keep his body warm. A beautiful maiden had to be found in the kingdom who would come to be his nurse and warmth. Abishag was her name and she attended to his needs, as he was much too feeble. In this state of weakness and lost virility, David still had not announced who would be his king replacement; and in his family now, chaos reigned because of his indecisiveness. It took the prodding of his wife Bathsheba and the prophet Nathan to finally get David to proclaim the kingly plan. King David, known throughout the ages as the "man after God's own heart," a valiant warrior, the composer of hymns and psalms, the former shepherd boy who defeated the mighty giant Goliath, and the one who gave in to the temptation of stealing his captain's wife and murdering him to cover up the wrong. Yet, most notably, you can't ignore how David played the passive father part in bringing up his children. . .

Babies require our attention and devotion. Our children as infants need to know that they are safe and cared for. As they grow and begin to experience life, they need us still to interact with them, modeling for them how to live while having safe boundaries--boundaries that get wider as they grow and show maturity. If we are passive and absent when they are young and never cause them discomfort with confrontation, we have let them down. It's much too late to intervene when they are grown adults. Perhaps that is what King David felt as he grieved during times of his family's losses.

I am no different than King David, I have my serious flaws and failures. I probably didn't always do the best thing or say the right thing as a parent. But I welcomed parenting and never chose to play the passive role. Now those days are over, and I realize how much more I could have done. I even understand my own parents now so much better than I did when I was younger. I realize how much you want your children to excel beyond your own expectations and aspirations. You want the absolute best for them. . .

But when your child is grown, you step behind, your days for action are in the past; now you keep on praying, and watch and wait . . . . .

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