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Sea of Grace


Too often, I have viewed these current days as a mighty sea determined to storm against me. Life hasn't swept by smoothly this year. Instead it's been a year of great extremes. Driving to our son's wedding brunch, I mentioned to my husband that life has really turned out so very different than what I ever thought it would. He answered with a question, "Why do you even have such preconceptions?" I had to think, yes, I often find myself comparing true reality to my own "mind reality." Maybe that's the source of a raging sea within . . .

Somehow, I guess I thought that those preconceptions would be better than the present. But when I find myself holding on to them, I lose my present joy in the moments set before me. I realized that day that I no longer want to miss out on life as it really is. The fact being that I get caught up in using my preplanned ideas to try and control circumstances. In that process, I end up feeling used and disappointed when it doesn't turn out my way. But what a selfish thing to even say or think!

I need a new vision of the sea. Yesterday, while hiking up the hill, with my happy companion, Goldyn, I realized that God has placed me in a sea of grace. The greater I have been in need, the more desperate my circumstances have become, the deeper His grace has swelled. You see, God is love, his intent toward me is good, he wants the best for me, he's always looking out for me. He is constantly reminding me that even if I'm drowning, I'm in his sea of grace and mercy. In that sea, I'll find that good can come from what I thought would be the end of me . . .

"The greatest saints are not those who need less grace, but those who consume the most grace, who indeed are most in need of grace--those who are saturated by grace in every dimension of their being."
(Dallas Willard, 2002)

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