Mary's Heartbeats

  I have just finished the autobiography of Eugene Peterson, "A Burning in My Bones." It has been hard to put the book down, as a new picture of Eugene, the author of "The Message," and so many other books, has emerged for me.  Most impressed upon me is his deep, deep love for people and His Lord and Savior.  He was captivated with silence and contemplation to the point of being too silent, especially with his lifetime mate, Jan.  Yet, I was so affirmed in having my own thoughts and questions, somewhat answered by one, who was not the perfect saint nor the one who went along with the "Christian majority," but thoughtfully aimed for a life of congruence, humility, great joy and gratitude.  He also discovered God's goodness in the beauty of each day, as well as the very ordinary.  I chuckled how he numbered all the creatures he saw on his hikes or walks, even taking notice to count horseflies and earthworms!  I realize more and more, that I do not need t...

It's rather comical, to think that the one who would be the very first King of a nation, would be out chasing donkeys! But here he was, Saul, the son of Kish, out on a mission to find his father's missing donkeys.  The journey takes him on and on throughout all the territory he has known, and leaves him pondering that if he goes any further his father will certainly be more concerned about his whereabouts instead of those rebellious run away beasts.  Where on earth could they be? So Saul, gets advice from his servant, that a man of God is in this very city where they are near and that everything he says comes true.  Sounds like a good idea to Saul, but they have eaten all the bread, what can be brought as a present to this man?  Fortunately, his servant had a quarter of a shekel and that would suffice for a gift.  You certainly wouldn't want to go empty handed.  So off they go toward the city, and walking up the hill to the city they get another tip from th...

I don't think we realize that the stuff we think we own isn't really ours.  From the time of being born into this world and cosmos, all that we have has been given to us.  We didn't even arrive  with the ability to provide ourselves with food or clothing.  We were dependent from the start. All  has been given, even our ability to take that very first breath of life outside of the comfort of our mother's womb.  All is really God's stuff. Watching my winter garden thrive, as broccoli and brussel sprouts are developing, I am mindful that although I have been the one to water the garden, to shoo away pesty insects, the actual growth and ultimate vegetable to eat is beyond me.  It's a transformation process I see outwardly, but a mystery as to how each day it is changed.  I see that this early morning, as the eastern sky has painted a magnificent spray of color before me.  Each day, each morning there has never been a sunrise like that one before....

  I did an unusual thing yesterday.  I typically have limited my music to a particular genre.  I don't think I have ever made a point to listen to an entire symphony.  But yesterday, I was encouraged to listen to Beethoven's 4th symphony.  There are actually several options to do so on Spotify, so I picked one and began to listen.  I began to marvel at the music, especially when I realized he didn't really start writing symphonies until he had become more deaf.  I wondered, how can one who is growing deaf make music so incredibly beautiful, especially when you are unable to fully hear the notes?  It's almost ironic, that one who cannot hear leaves this world with a soundtrack that still stands as some of the all time greatest music. Music makes mood, it quiets and stirs the heart, it brings joy and lightness.  Music is fun and makes you want to move, and yet it can also bring you to tears.  These could be tears of joy or sadness, as well...

  Too often we gloss over minor characters when we read a story.  Our tendency is to identify with the main character or more precisely the hero or heroine.  We bring that prejudice into our reading of Bible stories too.  I have just started reading the history books of the Old Testament, starting with 1 Samuel.  I had forgotten that it started out with the story of Hannah and her issue of infertility.  Usually, the focus of the story is on Hannah, her desperate prayer, her vow to God, and ultimately her answer to prayer by the birth of her son, Samuel.  Even her prayer of thanksgiving is utilized in Mary's prayer of thanks when her pregnancy of Jesus is confirmed with her cousin Elizabeth.  But this time, I noticed Peninnah.  She is wife #2 of Elkanah.  Reading the account, of only a few verses, I couldn't help but be reminded of two other sisters who shared a husband, Leah and Rachel.  There was infertility in that family as well,...

Welcome 2022!  Gypsy Rose wakens me with two piercing barks.  It's still dark throughout the house at 6 AM; it's cold too, as I grab my slippers and heavy robe.  It's nice to have quietness and a sense of calm, as I lay back on the bed in the guest room waiting for the coffee to finish.  Gypsy immediately plops down by my side, nuzzling her face determinedly into my side.  The New Year is here, barely a few hours old.  2021 has left or perhaps I have left 2021.  I feel like I'm shedding old skin.  It will never fit again, nor should it, and I really don't have any use for it either.  I won't be the same person that I was in former days or years, because time has already forced me to change.  My face evidences that fact with my smile lines permanently embedded well into my cheeks.  2022.  Weird to think that just about a hundred years ago, my parents were around the ages of 10 or 12.  I still can't believe they aren't here ...

Aftermath After the rain has stopped, After the snow has fallen, After the leaves have dropped face down, After the colored lights have dimmed, After the carols have all been sung, After the bows untied, the packages unwrapped, After all the Christmas cookies are gone,  After it's all over, What remains?    Aftermath, The pause between now and then, The break between past and future,  The mystery of the known and unknown, The New Year unfamiliar, the Old Year much too recognizable, What now? Where do I go from here?   Aftermath, Picking up the pieces of the undone, the unfinished, Put simply, living in the same manner, Pursuing peace and goodness, Practicing love for God, myself and others. Praying for greater faith to believe that even in my aftermath, Emmanuel is with me, Even if I don't recognize his Faithful Presence.   Aftermath,    An interrupted night,   A flock of sheep left unattended,   A chorus of angelic beings proclaiming th...