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Lifestyle of Gratitude


What a mess! The blue toilet water ran like a cascading waterfall over the sides of the white porcelain seat. I ran to grab towels to sop up the mess. The bad news was that earlier that day the washing machine had busted out its "shut off valve" for filling up the bin. That too ended up being a flood zone, but now I definitely needed its services to wash up these disgusting towels. I would have to figure out some way to make it work. Then comes the news that a coworker has tested positive for the dreaded COVID19 virus. Thanksgiving plans were definitely in question. In just a few short hours, life again took an unexpected turn!

Thanksgiving has held a very special meaning to me, especially over these past 2 years, as it marks the anniversary when I was first told of my cancer.  God has continued to show grace and mercy to me, and I am only here to be an image of that special favor.  I still do not fully comprehend the why and how that has been, but I  am deeply grateful.  When you are faced with death, the desire to live becomes all the more real. . .


Gypsy Rose now half way grown at 6 months and 1 day, is my faithful walking companion. I think we both flunked our last training session at the nearby park.  Gypsy was completely distracted by all the sights, sounds and smells of different stimuli and did not seem to pay any attention to me, to the point of my trainer even asking, "Have you been practicing? You only need 10 minutes a day to go through the exercises."  I had thought we were doing better, as I had seen improvement in her behavior at home and with the things she was learning, like dropping the ball for me when playing.  But evidently not, I took that news personally, and felt very dejected on our ride back home.  My husband was there to comfort and reassure me, "she's only a puppy, and she'll get it."  Yes, and maybe I too will get it.  Every day is a new day, and I continue to go through the "basics" as much as I can.  I realize I am like she is.  I want to go my own way, and do not always want to respond to my Master.  It boils down to a matter of trust.  Trusting that the Master has the journey under control and will only lead me along a safe path.

The other night I must have laid awake for a least an hour or two.  Awakened by my husband's return from work and from Gypsy excitedly greeting me at the side of my bed after coming in from a bathroom break.  I couldn't fall back to sleep, as I listened to the crunching of my husband with his bedtime snack, and felt the flashing lights from the TV screen.  Through my mind raced fear.  I do not want to get COVID19, and yet it seems to be running rampant through my work.  I really do not want to do weekly nasal swabs for testing, for I have an aversion for sticking things up my nose.  Yes, we can work from home, but there will be some weeks to return to the office, and then what? 

Sipping on my coffee, seated here on my couch, watching the darkness of the early morning turn into brilliant light, I am comforted with the words of hope given to Jeremiah, the prophet of old.  During the night of sleeplessness, I remembered that God said,"Call to Me, and I will answer you, and I will tell you great and mighty things, which you do not know." I pondered, "what are those things, Lord?"  I woke up with the same realities that had played out before me since Thanksgiving Day.  Yet, God's word told me in verse 6 of Jeremiah 33, "Behold, pay attention Mary, I will bring to it (to me) health and healing, and I will heal them (you); and I will reveal to them(you) an abundance of peace and truth (security).  God went on in that same chapter to remind me of His goodness to me, my family and even perhaps future generations.  He always forgives my mess-ups, my rebellion, my self-serving ways, my stubbornness, each day is a clean slate before Him.  He brings all the good, all the peace, all the joy and gladness to me, because He is a good God who cares for me with all His heart and all His soul.


I have had two weeks off from work.  I think I had great plans for all that I would do.  The plans included being able to be with my son and his wife, hiking, baking, and even maybe getting a Christmas tree to decorate with GQ's granddaughter.  But none of that happened, and instead each day was extremely ordinary.  I basically got up early, did my usual journal and devotional reading and walked daily with Gypsy Rose, who also had wonderful playtimes with the next door dogs, Molly and Blaze. I baked my delicious Sweet Potato bread, a cherry/blackberry pie, and made meals each day for GQ.  I enjoyed watching all the new episodes on my Netflix series "Virgin River."  I got up early, went to bed early, all very mundane days. I have never felt so rested.  Maybe I just needed to stop and quit trying to always do instead of "to be."


 I relish these cool crisp mornings, the joyful sounds of the birds, and the chattering of the squirrels.  I even caught the sound of a woodpecker on the top of our neighbor's tree.  The leaves reflect the change of season, and remind me always that God is One of restoration and transformation.  In all things, all events of life, He is still here to bring healing and hope.  My response then can only be a lifestyle of gratitude, in all things, the known, the unknown, the pleasant and unpleasant.  Why?  Because even in this, He is good, He is here.

 

"And I will rejoice over them to do them good, 

and I will faithfully plant them in this land 

with all My heart and with all My soul."

(Jeremiah 32:41) 

 

 

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