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Thankgiving Day #365

It's just me and Jasmine up this early, brisk Thanksgiving Day.  It would have been easier to stay curled up in a warm bed, than to get out this morning.  But here we are, in our usual morning spots.  Me on my couch with my books and journal, warm coffee close by and Jasmine laid out on her UCLA blanket covered pillow.  A heavy rain has saturated the backyard, and most likely our mountains will be splendid with snow.  Soon I will start the turkey and the house will fill with inviting smells and sounds of family "hanging out."  

And here I am, day #365 as a cancer survivor!  It has been exactly one year since my life took an unexpected turn.  I am filled with overflowing joy and tears that seem to cascade out of me whenever I ponder this fact.  In a paradoxical way, it has been one of my best years ever, if not THE best.  I have completely enjoyed my NP days, returning to work and relishing the long term relationships I have had with so many of my patients.  A dear patient, a breast cancer survivor of many years, my "sistuh" always sends me an encouraging card throughout each holiday or season of the year, and recently blessed me with 2 dozen long stem roses. I find myself smiling more and letting go of potential frustrations, especially of the political kind.  (I do not need to yell at a TV screen!)  I have gained new strength and pure pleasure with discovering hiking in our local mountains.  Last week, it was like being on vacation in a new land.  The hike started out among a splattering of large orange golden leaves along a bubbling creek and waterfalls, and then ended up in a snowy path along the higher peaks, all surrounded by the bluest sky and swirling clouds.  I couldn't take it all in, it was just too much . . . 

Somehow, it must have been like that when Mary, the newly pregnant virgin, greeted her older relative Elizabeth.  It was just a greeting, a "hello, Elizabeth, I'm here," that made Elizabeth's baby of 6 months leap within her.  It was an intimate moment that only could be shared by 2 pregnant women.  It was God using ordinary means, a kicking and fluttering of an unborn baby, to remind them of Himself.  He was able to do the impossible with making a baby grow within an older, formerly barren woman like Elizabeth.  Plus, now He was doing the impossible with a virgin, gifting her with Himself, giving her the Savior of the world. 

And yes, He has done the impossible with me.  For all intensive purposes, I should not be here, the type of cancer much too deadly, as any cancer is.  I will never fully understand God's grace to me, but I will continue to give Him all the praise for it.  I will live out whatever years I have ahead, (as now I can count years instead of days) with love and joy.  

Thanksgiving 2019, Day #365, God's gift of life, blessing and grace to me . . .  

 

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